I mentioned in my last post that I am reading “In theName of Jesus” by Henri Nouwen and it is kicking my butt. Nouwen talks about the temptation of power and I have to say (sadly) that I think this is an issue for me. Those of you who know me might resonate with these words of Nouwen “I had come to believe that growing older and more mature meant that I would be increasingly able to offer leadership. In fact, I had grown more self-confident over the years. I felt I knew something and had the ability to express it and be heard. In that sense I felt more and more in control.” WOW! If I were honest, those words could be mine. If you read my post on constructive criticismand a critical spirit, this may be a deeper look at why I have a tendency to be more critical than helpful.
Nouwen goes on to say “what makes the temptation of power so seemingly irresistible? Maybe it is that power offers an easy substitute for the hard task of love. It seems easier to be God than to love God, easier to control people than to love people, easier to own life than to love life.” Am I that much of a jerk? I am on a quest for power? For control? Lord, may you work in my heart to soften me and help me learn to love.
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